permission to dream

as i continue to try and find a way to go to miami and photograph my kids with this piano (dreaming that it IS possible), the past couple days has had me thinking a ton about dreaming and risk-taking. then i saw the following post on facebook, from my friend (and past workshop attendee), jess --

my dream: to have a photograph i have taken...on the cover of a book. i swear...i buy books by their cover...and would die if i could accomplish that!

and i thought, why don't we share our dreams -- our wishes, hopes, desires, aspirations -- more often? what a powerful thing, to put your dreams out there. to set them free. and surround yourself with supporters. and other dreamers. truly, what do we have to lose?

i  so believe... in dreaming big. working hard. taking risks. knowing that anything is possible if we allow ourself to dream!!

yesterday, i read this quote and found it so inspiring... if we always did what was known, there would be nothing to learn, explore or gain. isn’t it the surprises, the unexpected twists and turns that give meaning to our journey and make our dreams happen? Without risk, we’d stay hunkered down in our heads instead of living out loud in our hearts. - author unknown

and then i happened across this quote this morning. every thought you think is taken as a command by your subconscious, but it’s your strongest thoughts that become your true goals. - brian mayne

can't help but think how truly powerful it is to fill your mind up with positive thoughts and big dreams.  so tell me, WHAT IS YOUR DREAM(S)?

it's my party

today is my trainer / crossfit gym owner's birthday and it's my party was the name of our workout of the day (WOD) this morning. 51 deadlifts 51 bench presses 51 squats

and so i dedicate this post to paula! thank you for inspiring me so, teaching me that strong is beautiful and that 50s are fucking fabulous.

i've now been crossfitting for 5-1/2 months and couldn't be happier. it's addicting, i tell ya. my weight and measurements haven't budged much since my initial loss at the 5-week point, but i know my body is getting stronger, toner and hopefully leaner.

i recently weened myself from private sessions, which i loved but are expensive, and am now attending four group classes a week (M-W-F-S). i love, love, love it...and can't wait to see where this crossfit journey continues to take me.

here's my pre-photos and then a few update pics from this morning...

may 2010

today ((i had just got home from crossfit, drank a smoothie and was freezing)

i hope my updates will continue to inspire others.  remember that it's never too late. find what works for you and do it.  you CAN do it!!

and if  you have any questions, PLEASE ask!! i'll either answer in an ETA section below or another blog post.

and a few photos, just for fun, from my it's my party series.

this is too good

...not to share everywhere i can. sid savara shares seven reasons why you should never check email first thing in the morning. balance is something that most, if not all, (digital) photographers have great trouble with, especially when it comes to too much time spent on the computer. i think about all the time i spend on the computer -- checking email, editing, blogging, updating, twittering, facebooking, pinteresting, flickering (just to name a few). we talk about all kinds of ideas on how plan to limit our computer time, but it's like crack or something...we're just drawn in and once you're in, you need more. but i'm going to work really hard to start here --and not getting on my computer first thing in the morning. i'm thinking if i'm up at 6:30 (getting the kids off to school), i should give myself until at least 9:30 AM (an hour after i drop kiele off to school) before i touch my computer.

i summarized mr savara's seven steps below...

1. ignorance is bliss...fully productive. when you get up, work on something important first, for 30-45 minutes. you don't know what needs to be addressed, what fires need to be put out, what your best friend has to share, etc. i

2. it's not YOUR to-do list. do what's the most important thing for you to work on instead of being tasked by other people via your email. remember who is in charge of your time -- focus your time and energy on what YOU really would like to work on.

3. it's an excuse to lack direction. if you're checking email (first thing in the morning or often), it's because you haven't decided what your high priorities are and focused on them. when you don't have a clear list of priorities, checking email becomes an urgent one, often at the expense of the important ones.

4. reaction vs. 'proaction'. what is the chance that you checked your email at the exact right moment to address that super important email that just came through? checking email often forces you to react as items come in regardless of their true priority. instead, take proactive actions and work on the things that are important to you.

5. searching for excuses. don't check your email if you're looking for a way to get out of the task at hand -- acknowledge what needs to get done and do it.

6. there's no set time limit. checking email really only takes a minute - but you can get sucked into follow-up activities that result from checking email. don't let email suck you in and cause you to devote more time than you can afford; set productive hours.

7. it builds expectations. how many people say "but i have to check my email; people expect my to reply right away." that's a bunch of bullshit (he didn't really say that, i did). if people do expect a response from you right away, it's because you've created that expectation.

how many of us waste time online, while we should be working on our to-do list? i know i'm so guilty. some days i'm better than others. for a while, i kept my written to-do list up-to-date and plugged away at it. every day, i circled my high priority items and got them done. i need to get back to doing that.

you can read mr sivara's full article here. i now have his site bookmarked. hoping to be inspired by more of his articles. thanks for the little kick in the ass tara and getting me refocused again.  i'm going to work hard at finding a better balance -- and focus on the things that are truly important!!

it's a swirly mess

yep, just like that...i feel like i'm back to a swirly mess. my mind...that is. spinning in circles. with thoughts. questioning. wondering.

i see blog posts about why we do photography? and i see blog posts about beautiful, confident, amazing women.

and my mind just starts swirling... about who i am. and what do i REALLY believe is important. about what really matters.

and then i silently whisper (or yell) to myself... really.......what is important? damn it.....WHAT?

and then i go on to read another blog post or edit a photo or answer an email or waste time on pinterest, but amongst the swirly mess, the yelling continues... really, what the fuck is important and really matters in all this... in life. in photography. in everything.

i'm not sure i'll ever have a complete grasp on the answers but i'm so thankful for these amazing women in my life, who continue to challenge me, get my mind swirling and keep me on the right track. even though they might not know it, i'm so, so grateful for their presence, voice and encouragement.

and so with all that said, i share an important, every day moment in our everyday life -- an after-school-watching-tv kind of moment.

an artist's style

i subscribed to nate williams' newsletters long ago because i loved one of his art print posters and they happened to be sold out. i was hopeful that maybe he would re-issue it in the future. little did i know that i'd also be receiving great, inspiring articles for creatives from nate williams. in his most recent newsletter, he included an article, does a professional illustrator need a "style". he shares...

As an illustrator, art directors hire you because they want to give a project a specific tone, feeling and they need to be able to count on your work being a certain way for their project, campaign, etc. It’s kind of like choosing a font. Imagine if you bought a Metallica CD and it was full of acoustic Bolivian folk music .. you would be kind of confused??? Art directors usually don’t want to play “style roulette”. This doesn’t mean you can’t do other styles…it just means when you present them to clients have consistency between the bodies of work. A number of illustrators, writers, and musicians work under various names for this vary reason. For example, my other style .. or alter ego is Alexander Blue. This is a wackier, colorful style geared for kids.

and regarding, does having a "style" mean never changing or growing, he states,

No, it just means have consistency between the bodies of work you present. (ie Nate Williams, Alexander Blue .. both me .. just grouped accordingly)

such great words to embrace and think about!! and i love that these thoughts are from a different type of an artist -- an illustrator versus another photographer.

had me thinking, for sure. i often have a difficult time seeing or talking about my own style, although i will when one forces me to. but i do know what i love. and i work hard to only put the photos that i really love in my portfolio. at the end of the day, i feel like if you do your thing and you're honest about what you love and share that in your portfolio, your style will shine without even trying.

and...i'm so excited about ordering this fabulous nate williams print, which was very similar to the print that i was originally longing for. a beautiful life indeed...

lastly, an image from the other day, while shooting with my friend, kathy wolfe. it had been a while since i shot.  and it makes my heart so, so happy when i do.

p.s. no birds were added or manipulated in this image.  it is as it magically was that day...and at that moment.  :-)

so what was it?

saw a great movie last night -- exit through the gift shop. i had absolutely no idea what it was about but saw that another photographer on twitter highly recommended it. that was good enough for me, to put it in my netflix queue. i don't want to give anything away but it's a banksy film, which i didn't know while watching it (thought he was just an actor in the documentary).  peta had introduced me to banksy years ago.

after the movie, i was left wondering... what was it? was he simply brilliant? was he a bit (or more than a bit) crazy? was he uber-confident? was he ultra-determined? was he always meant to be an artist?

i'd like to share a bit more but it would give some of the movie away, so i'll leave it at that. it's really a great documentary and opened my eyes about a lot of things and...made me think.

here's the trailer, although i'm not sure i'd be any more convinced to watch it after watching the trailer...

and an image i love of banksy's. i think i secretly would love to go grafitti inspiring phrases all over town. you know, like you are beautiful and be yourself and you can do anything. okay, maybe it's not so much of a secret anymore. but my husband said no. and with my luck, i'd probably get caught by the cops on my first outing anyways.

.

photography journey

i was just going through my website, checking how everything looked and flowed, after making some recent changes and updates. and as i went through my portfolio images, tears filled my eyes. i just feel so blessed to have met all the people i've met, while on this photography journey. the clients, who have trusted me to photograph their families and/or their children -- some of them, over and over again.  many of my friends, who i so cherish and would most likely have never met if i hadn't pursued photography. and to be a military family, which has given me so many opportunities to meet new people and explore new areas. i really hope that my photography journey has only just begun...but no matter what, i am grateful for all that i have experienced, which has truly filled my heart and soul. and to think, i may never have started down this photography path without going through those three months of hell in 2005, living in the rat, maggot and fly infested house, in san diego. some things are just meant to happen...even though we may not realize the gift they will one day bring us, at the time.

from san diego, where i first started learning photography, to kansas, which i never imagined i would enjoy as much as i did, to tampa, where i hope, dream and wish my journey to continue and paths to expand.

should you

...work for free? if you haven't seen this yet, it's a funny read. but not really. it's something to REALLY think about as you contemplate doing business for free. i definitely have my opinionated thoughts about doing complimentary work and those attending the wallflower friends retreat will be hearing about some of those thoughts soon. :-)

created by jessica hische | view the original, larger version here

also... a great little interior design blog post here on when "fine art meets family portraits".

and since i love to include photos with my posts, here's a few favorites of my kids from the past five years...

can't help but mention that in the shot above, it was the first day ryder was potty trained (wearing big boy underwear), he scribbled all over himself and had sky's ponytail holders on, which we called his 'wonder boy bracelets'. sigh...where does the time go?

hope more

yesterday, while i was cooking dinner, kiele presented me with this gift. for no other reason than to give. she wrote the poem. she painted the artwork. and shared that each image in the drawing has a connection with a word or line in the poem.

The Heart of a Whole A catching dream to fade away Along the chanting breeze Not the slightest wisp left behind A teardrop on a fallen song And when the stars blaze I could hope for nothing more Than the dove's surrendered gift Where half my heart goes to To the mother I always love - Kiele Marston 2011 (age 13)

polaroid of kiele, taken this morning before heading off to school

somewhere (wish i remembered where) i was recently reading about how as children, we simply create (draw, cut, paint, etc.) for the love of creating. we don't worry about who is going to like it or if anyone is going to like it.

we created it. we like it. and that's what matters.

and then we grow up and begin questionning ourselves. doubting ourselves. worrying about what others think. but i don't want to be that way; i want to get back to that magical place of childhood, where i create for the love of creating and not worry about what anyone else thinks. i hope (and will hope more as they continue to grow up) that my kids never lose this gift that every child is blessed with -- the gift of creating, for the simple love and enjoyment of creating.

i can't thank my children enough for being my most important and wondrous inspiration -- in my life, in my art, in my every day everything.

portfolio questions answered

after my initial portfolios post, i started receiving some emails / questions regarding portfolios, so i decided to answer those questions here... i am always stuck on getting all my images to look the same. like i see many other photographers accomplish... Do you edit all your images the same?..or do you let the image determine how you edit (if you edit at all). Do you think it is important for the consistency or rather letting the image stand out, even if that means it does not "look" like the others..

very rarely do i edit the same; my editing changes with time and often is affected by my mood.  however, i will try to edit a single client session similar or at least make sure that it flows and is cohesive.  and yes, i absolutely let the image determine how i will edit it. i like to say that i feel the image.

i believe that each and every portfolio image is independent of one another and so i don't worry about images within my galleries looking similar or flowing.  i hope they are cohesive though -- in being honest with my portfolio selections, i hope they all look like me [my photography], which lends to natural cohesiveness.

What do you think is a good number of images for a website gallery?

i don't think there's a magic number to the amount of images for a website gallery; however, you do have to be careful of too many.  how many is too many? i'm not sure.  i guess this is really artist dependent.  i try to keep in mind that i don't want to overwhelm my prospective clients.

I notice you seem to integrate more artistic images very well - I have a hard time with this, and I'm not sure how well my own site/portfolio flows. What are your thoughts on combining artistic projects and portrait work?

i have my projects and portrait work in separate groupings [portfolios & projects] on my website; however, that doesn't mean i don't have artsy images within my portrait galleries.  for me, i have absolutely no problem mixing my images. in the end, whether artsy or not-so-artsy, i hope they are both strong and both scream me. i don't think there's a right or wrong answer as to combining or making separate. sometimes  you just have to play and do what seems to work best for your artistry and your website. i do have some images that i love that just don't flow on my website portfolio and so they are not there. for example the images below. i absolutely love them but i don't think they work on my current website | portfolios. but that doesn't mean they won't in the future, as i'd love to begin photographing more in client's homes.  if that was the case, maybe these photos could be part of my online portfolio.

I was just going through your portfolio (love!) and noticed your kiddos were on there. Someone (can't remember who??) once told me not to put my kids photos on the portfolio. I can't even remember why?? Anyway.. I took that to heart and have like 2 photos of my girls on my portfolio. I used to have a section called 'Mine' with my fave photos of my girls.. but got rid of that too. What are your thoughts on this? Some of my fave photos are of my own kids... but then perhaps it is just my own bias because I am so emotionally attached to them.

i think there is NOTHING wrong with having your own children on your website (obviously).  however, i do want to caution you on mommy goggles. every mom photographer knows what i'm talking about -- those images that might not be as strong as others but we have a hard time seeing that because we're emotionally attached to the image because they're our cute kids. just make sure that the images of your kids that you're putting on your site are strong and what you want to shoot with your clients. if you're not sure, run the image by a friend, who will be honest with you.

I hear the needing to keep portfolio images in one easy to access place. I’d love to hear more about how you organize this.

i think portfolio organization is so important. i have a 'portfolio' folder. within that folder, i have a 'high res' and 'low res' folder. and that's it. you're organized. the reason a high res folder is a must is because over time, your website will probably change. with a new website comes new sized web images. if that's the case and your organized, you simply go to your 'high res' folder and batch process the high res files to the new web size needed.

with that being said, my 'high res' folder (10x14 at 300 dpi) is very fluid -- images come and go. if i'm on the fence about an image, i might just leave it there. if i know the image no longer speaks to me, i remove it from my portfolio folder.

also, i recently switched to lightroom and imported all my high res portfolio images and tagged them with the word portfolio (keyword). now, as i shoot a new image that i want in my portfolio, i add the portfolio keyword and then export it to my high res and low res folder.

the key is having all your portfolio images in one place, for easy access.

How do you keep all your portfolio images organized, categorized and sorted so you can find and refer to them easily. I love so many and typically forget I own them or where they are. I am referring to digital and Polaroid.

having my portfolio images in one folder is enough to keep them organized, categorized and sorted.  you really shouldn't have thousands of images in your portfolio.  or even hundreds for that matter (IMO). i do have separate portfolio folders though, e.g. 'portfolio client', 'portfolio polaroid', 'portfolio dress', etc.

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if you have a portfolio question, feel free to add it in the comments and i'll do my best to answer in an ETA section of this post.

a contest | friendship

with our winter wallflower friends retreat right around the corner and *registration closing in two weeks, we thought it was a perfect time for a photo contest. and we're excited to share that the winner will receive a gift certificate from lensbaby, to select the lens of your choice.

to enter the contest:

simply, post your favorite FRIENDSHIP-themed photo to the wallfower friends facebook page and include the following link in your caption:

http://www.wallflowerfriends.com/wallflower-friends-blog/2011/1/7/photo-contest.html

contest deadline is friday, january 14th at 5 PM (CST).  winner will be announced on facebook monday, january 17th.

only one entry per person.

*just a few seats remain. if interested, we encourage you to register soon.  registration closes jan 21!!

wonderment

it's what i don't capture enough of...my kids' every day wonderment. their every day life. their every day everything. one of my goals, wishes, hopes, desires, dreams this year is to photograph more of our real life.  i started to do it last year but it became more of a project (series aspiration) and only lasted one month until i became paralyzed. this year, i want to remove all pressure and just shoot for the beauty of capturing glimpses of their every day. because you know what...it really is magical.  and when it comes down to it, it's what i'll long for in the end.

this was ryder yesterday, in his fort, which he was so, so proud.  a treasured image...one that is destined for the pages of my 2011 annual book.

and then there's this one, taken last night, of sky -- all dolled up, to include eye shadow and lip gloss, and ready to go to her friend's 8th birthday party sleepover.  shot at night at 3200 ISO.

portfolios

ask anyone who knows me...i have a thing about website portfolios. and here's some of my pretty opinionated thoughts... clients come to your website to get an idea of who you are as a photographer and the photographs you produce. they want to have a thorough understanding about what they're potentially going to invest in. and therefore it's important for you to have an honest and up-to-date representation of yourself and your work. your portfolio is your business' first impression. and shouldn't you have that first impression be the best it can be?

nothing frustrates me more than when photographers say they they don't have time to update their portfolio. especially for years!! for me, updating my portfolio is not even an annual thing; it's ongoing throughout every year. my prospective clients deserve that. they deserve to know exactly what they're getting if they choose to invest in me, as their photographer.

and i hope that anyone i have photographed over the years would say that i have an honest representation of my work on my website.

so as we start this new year, PLEASE consider looking through and updating your website portfolio. and then consider continuing to update throughout the year.

here's a few photographs that i just added to my portfolio. and with that, a few others that didn't feel quite right any longer, were removed.

and a couple oldies that just made it back into my portfolio.  that's the beauty of portfolios; your loves, tastes, editing, etc. -- it all changes over time.

ETA:  i just had another thought.  i've heard from some photographers,

if they [clients] want to see updated photos, they're on my blog.

well if that's the case and that's the route you want to go, get rid of your main website. again, if you have a site AND a blog, take responsibility for both of them. your client doesn't know what you're thinking; they just know what they see.

lastly, keeping your high-res portfolio images organized and easily found will greatly help in portfolio management, access and updates.  trust me! :-)

meant to be

you know how you feel that you're just meant to do something? well that's how i feel about shooting polaroid. i'm not sure i can explain it. but it nags at me. to keep going. to keep shooting. to keep investing. of course, i struggle with my brain and waiver at times but ultimately, i'm always brought back to this darn polaroid camera.

but it's not easy. nor reliable (especially if you purchase 600 film off ebay, which i don't recommend). and it's expensive. and that can be frustrating.

i'm trying to figure out a way to incorporate polaroid into my client session because i think they're magical. and therefore, i think i should. i have some definite ideas.

here's a few shots from yesterday that have now become up there with my all time fav photographs.

yes, i believe it's meant to be. and well...that's good enough for me.

and of course, i have the 'remember who you are' polaroid, which i will forever treasure. and is now hanging as a framed 20x20 print right above my desk. maybe i'll enlarge and frame a few others and have a wall of polaroids.

CA model(s) needed | feb 13th

our wallflower friends winter retreat is quickly approaching and i'm looking for child and family models.  optimally, i am looking for a family with two girls, who can take direction and are not shy of the camera.  or i could work with one family and then two girls, ages 5-12 (two girls could be from same family or different). the session will begin with the family and progress to lensbaby photos of the girls (see photos below) and be approximately an hour long (start time 4:30 PM).

the shoot location will be at the 29 palms inn, twentynine palms, california.  there is no session fee and models will receive complimentary high-resolution digital files of all edited images.

please email me the following information if interested: name ages of child(ren) recent photo of children and / or family (within past two months)

and feel free to email me with any and all questions.

how my brain works

i was twittering yesterday about how i'm so inspired to shoot polaroid right now.  and proceeded to purchase packs of film for my treasured SX-70 polaroid camera.  i then emailed back and forth a with a friend about inspiration. my brain is usually a mile a minute. always has been. probably always will be, although now that i'm older, i find that if i don't write things down, i forget.  i guess that complicates things a big.  but it's the way i work. i'm usually thinking about 20 (or more) things at once. and my body usually follows suit. it often drives leah, who i talk to about five or so times a day, crazy because while we're so similar in so many ways, the way our brains work is so very different. i often flip-flop from topic to topic in one short conversation and she will usually tell me,

i'm not at that place to talk about that right now.

and so i've learned and now our conversations go more like this,

when you're at the place to talk about XYZ, we need to talk about that. we both laugh. she says okay and we later get around to talking about XYZ.

so with that rambling, let me get back to inspiration. i feel that inspiration filters in the same way my brain works and it is often overwhelming. i want to shoot polaroid. i want to try film. with this camera. and that camera. or maybe i should just start playing with my iphone camera more and see what i can create. i want to try this idea. and work on this series. and that idea too. and the list goes on and on. and on and on. to the point that i somewhat paralyze myself, my shooting and my inspired self.

i haven't quite figured out what to do about all this, except maybe writing down everything i want to do and try and am inspired by. and tackle it like i do my to-do lists. circle the priority or two on said inspiration list and commit to following through. i don't know if it will help but it's worth a try. focus my artistry as i am trying to focus my personal life and get things done.

or maybe just try yoga because i hear it's pretty awesome and it might calm my mind a bit. for the moment, the thought of yoga still scares me (that i can't calm my mind).

i know i'm not alone with this. if you struggle with similar or have thoughts on this, please share. i'd love to hear about it.

here's a polaroid of sky i took as we headed out the door to school yesterday.  definitely more polaroids in the near future.  i can't tell you how happy my heart is with that darn camera. one of these days, i'd love to incorporate polaroids into my client sessions.  i definitely have ideas regarding a polaroid add-on package.  just have to get comfortable with the new film that the impossible project is putting out. there's something magical about polaroid.

just because

because this video made me laugh out loud.because i can see my seven-year-old doing this in six or so years. because these moms are so damn cool. because facebook is kind of random and not everyone who follows my blog is on facebook... i share this fricken hilarious video here.

p.s. yes, i have a 13-year-old but no, i can't see her every doing something like this.

the power of giving

while i was on vacation, in nevada, i got an email from margot.  she was emailing to make sure it was okay that they used one of my photos of sam in their 2010 family photos, which she wanted to post on  her blog. the first thought that came to mind, along with the tears, was, are you KIDDING me? you NEVER have to ask me about using the photos i took of sam. but instead, i replied,

absolutely. and please don't ever feel you need to ask me about using sam's photos at anytime, for anything. please just use them.

for those who didn't follow my journey with sam and his family, let me share a bit. sam went to the same elementary school in san diego, as kiele. i had learned of sam from kiele's deaf itinerant teacher, diane (sam was hearing impaired due to chemo). i asked diane to share with sam's parents that i was available to them any time at all, to photograph sam and their family. time went on. life was busy. and i hadn't heard from sam's parents.

then one day in late 2006, while photographing kiele's classmates, i ran to sam's class and asked the teacher if i could pull sam out of class for a few photos. i knew sam's teacher because kiele had had her for 2nd grade. so i pulled sam out of class and took a few photos. once the prints arrived, i boxed them up, brought them to sam's teacher and asked that she give them to the parents and tell them that they are a gift from me.

one of those photos, from the very first time i photographed sam, is the framed photo below.

© meredith brunette

i share this for a couple of reasons: first, the power of giving back is beyond words. if you haven't given back in some way (and i'm not talking monetarily; we all have our gifts, talents, information, etc.), i beg you to. give when and however you can. it can be as simple as giving a helping hand to someone in need. second, don't be discouraged whenever attempting to give and it's not working out exactly as planned. if i've made an honest, whole-hearted attempt and it doesn't work out, that's all i can do (except with sam, i was able to find a workaround). the reason i say this is because i have received quite a few emails sharing that they are trying to give their photography services but the person / parent isn't responding and they're wondering how to proceed.

it amazing how when  you give and expect absolutely nothing in return, they fill your heart so greatly. these families that i have photographed over the years have touched my heart and soul and given me so much...more than words could ever describe.

after those initial photos of sam at school, i continued to photograph sam and his family for the next three years...until sam, after so much strength and fighting, sadly lost his battle to neuroblastoma on march 12th, 2010.

in memory of sam, here are some of my favorite photos from the years i photographed him. miss you buddy!

if you haven't already, i hope this will help inspire you to incorporate giving into your 2011.

our role in history

a couple weeks ago, steph shared this amazing photograph with me (beyond the obvious capture of the moment, there's such awesome timing and composition). the photo was taken mid-february 1975, when mike (steph's husband) was about 10 weeks old. mike's dad, bill, was coming back from a six-month deployment on the USS independence, where bill was an A7 corsair II jet pilot, doing his department head tour.

and then there's this photo, taken december 18th 2010 of mike's homecoming, from being deployed six months.  he, too, met his baby for the first time, at 10 weeks old.  and mike, too, is a fighter pilot, who was doing his department head tour.

i feel so incredibly blessed to have captured this image for the beaty family.  hopefully it will be a photograph that will be treasured and passed down for generations, just as above photo from 1975 has.

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my friends and i have talked a lot about photographs and their role in history, especially those coming from professional, editorial, etc. photographers. what's real? what's not? what has been altered? what's been added? the thought of photographers altering the photographic documentation of history is upsetting.  are they documenting history at all? or creating their own history, in a sense.

although i have to admit...sadly, i am guilty.  i'm not sure my kids have many photos that haven't been altered in some way (contrast added, a pimple removed, etc.). and yes, that makes me sad. damn it.

hmmm...maybe that's an idea to start this year.  in my family's annual book, i will include at least one completely unaltered photo of each of my kids.  i like the idea of the photo being of them non-smiling.  just them being them. kind of like this...

found via pinterest.  amazing, huh?!! quite a brilliant idea. i couldn't find the exact source for the above photo collage, but when i clicked it from my pinterest, it took me to this blog.

yes, i will definitely do that. at least one photo. it's a start. and i think i'll make that one photo film.

ETA: my sweet friend, erin, just posted a comment about the 'perfect shot' and i can't tell you how guilty i am of that so i wanted to add here.  i long to let go. to be free. it was actually one of my monthly resolution topics -- LET GO (being less perfect) -- to capture the everything just the way it is. stepping back and capturing more of the scene is something i am going to really try and work on this year. thanks for sharing erin. love you friend.

a remarkable story...

a remarkable newly discovered collection of photographs. if you haven't seen, heard or read about vivian maier's story, please take some time to view the chicago tonight news clip (attached below) or you can read the story here, on chicago magazine. talking about the right person being in the right place at the right time.

self-portrait of vivian maier, from the john maloof collection

to think vivian maier's talent and photographic work is just now being discovered is crazy. her eye as a street photographer was amazing, in my humble opinion.  i can't wait to see how this all continues to unfold. and i hope one day to attend one of her exhibitions.

also, kickstarter has been collecting money to fund a feature length documentary film on vivian maier.  while it's already been fully funded, they're continuing to collect for another 70 days.  if you pledge a certain amount, you will receive a copy of the completed film and | or a copy of the book.  i pledged.  :-)

truly amazing!