is there a perfect time?

a friend posed this question today on her facebook wall:  what is holding  you back from booking a family photo session? quite a few women (moms) quickly commented that their weight is holding them back, which made me really sad. and a few posted money, which i understand but i also believe that there's enough photographers out there to cover everybody's budget.

this all led me to thinking about the perfect time.

is there ever a perfect time to have photographs taken of your family?

i posted on our wallflower friends blog today about an awesome article i read, which had the overall theme of taking the time to slow down and appreciate life and the everyday beauty that surrounds us.  in a swirly kind of way, i feel what i shared there and what i'm sharing here is totally intertwined.

it's so easy to say -- i'm too fat. i have too much going on. we're too busy. maybe next year.

but i just want to say STOP IT! we need to take the time to appreciate the value of family photos, if not for ourselves (because we're too fat or whatever), then for our children.  in 20 years, your children are not going to say,

i really love this photo of my family but i wish my mom had waited until she lost some weight.

and i think about steve's mom, who died when she was 40, only months after being diagnosed with breast cancer. steve was five at the time she passed away. he cherishes every single photo of his mom (not just the ones where she was thin, beautiful and looked perfect).

and kirsten sandstrom, who recently passed away at the age of 37, leaving behind a husband and three young boys. i don't think for one second that those boys will look at photographs of their mom (who pre-cancer probably wished she could have lost some weight) and see her as anything except the most amazing and beautiful mom there ever was.

we never know what tomorrow will bring our way.  and life is quickly racing by; before we know it, our kids will be grown and leaving the house.

NO, THERE IS NO PERFECT TIME.

i hope that this will inspire someone, who might be waiting for that perfect time or to lose a couple of pounds, to book a photographer...today!

and let us all try to slow down, remember what's important and see and hear the everyday beauty that surrounds us. © deb schwedhelm | tampa family photographer

san diego summer portrait sessions

i've had some recent san diego inquiries and am thrilled to share that i'll be returning to san diego the weekend of june 4th and 5th and july 17th and 18th, for child and family portrait sessions.  i still have a couple sessions available.  if interested in reserving a session, please email me. so very excited!!

here's a few images from my last fabulous san diego visit

busy as a bee

yep, busy as a bee... i've been photographing and designing books for my little ones' classes (preschool and first grade) the past couple weeks.  along with paying taxes, book keeping, calling accountant, working on workshop, ordering and shipping prints, working on a new website, etc...i've been crazy busy.  i absolutely love giving this gift to the teachers and parents every year!!

this year for sky's class, i took photos at the beginning of first grade and then the end of the year. it was rather mind-blowing how much some of the kids changed in one year.

for their book, i used both sets of pictures and the kids drew and wrote what they wanted to be when they grow up. reading their writings was one of the cutest things ever. here's a few of my favorites...

I wont to be a farmer becuaes I wont to help peaple eat hulfee.

I wont to be a vet to help animals. And I wont to be a fotogerfer to take beautiful pickshers.

When I grow up I will be a Dr. and a hair stilitst because I'd help pepl and kids. I will be a hair stilitst because I cut hair and do dipheret hair stils.

I what to be a army man becus my Dad was in Irack. I think it is a good job to help the world.

Wen I grow up I want to be a vetcherereen becuse I want to help anamals.

I want to be a arme man becas it is cool. and I like camaflog. I like to get trained.

and this is the preschool book layout (they also drew what they wanted to be when they grow up and then i asked them some questions)...

and speaking of busy, gotta run...having a friend over for dinner and need to grocery shop and clean.  i'll have to make sure i buy something hulfee :-)

can we slow things down a bit...

...please?  because kiele is THIRTEEN! can you believe it? me neither. officially a teenager...and still as wonderful, sweet and good as ever.

i was looking at old photos of kiele and as i looked through the photos, memories and stories of kiele flooded my mind (that's what photos are supposed to do, right?!). in celebration of kiele's birthday, i thought i'd share a few photos and thoughts here...

sweet, sweet kiele --

you have this ability to touch people like no other. people meet you and always seem to fall in love with the person you are. i hear it time and time again...how incredibly special you are. there has been plenty of times, especially at your schools, where strangers will stop me in the hallway to tell me what a great kid you are. my heart beams and tears flood my eyes knowing you have this gift and it comes so naturally.  needless to say, i'm one proud momma and feel so very blessed!

and i can honestly say, this goodness about you started as a baby. momma carmen watched you from six weeks old until age four. while you started as simply one of the day care children, you quickly became part of their family. and well, you thought of them as family too -- calling them momma carmen and daddy jim. while many mommas might have worried about that, i didn't; i adored it.  thanks to you, we will forever be family with one another.

after your daddy and i got a divorce, i know things were tough for you. but you were always so strong. i adored how you slept with your daddy's photograph every night for years and years. eventually it came out of the frame and was laminated (easier to sleep with that way).  over the years, it had fallen apart and was taped together multiple times (by you). one day, i tried to scan it and replace it with a new one, but you wouldn't have anything to do with it and made me give you back the old one -- the one that was falling apart, perfect and not to be messed with.  that photograph is now back in a frame and graces your nightstand, right next to your bed.

here's the oh-so-loved-perfectly-taped-together picture of kiele's dad, scanned a couple years ago.

and baby marston, who was named that from the very beginning. you loved him so much (yes, he was a him). it breaks my heart that he's now packed away in the back of your closet. i took this series of fictional photographs when you were eight. now this day is a reality and i sit here with a lump in my throat, wishing i could stop time for a bit or at least slow it down. (larger version here)

you are the best big sister ever.  even though there is a six-year spread between you and sky, you've always played with the little ones often and so well.  you've now started to really enjoy your private space and time, yet you still let the little ones in to share with you (most of the time).  they adore you beyond words. and you have set and continue to set such an amazing example for them.

i found the three of you like this in the backyard, so many times. each time, i would look in awe...cherishing how well you played together.

i will never forget the day your cochlear implant was turned on and you could hear...i mean really hear, for the first time!  you were so brave during the surgery and the recovery.  the moment you heard water run in the bathroom for the first time and you came running to tell me was magical.  you have never used your disability as a crutch and my guess is that you never will. i love how you don't hide your cochlear implant and how you are proud of who you are and what you've overcome and accomplished.

being a military family, i always worry about you when we move every couple years -- a new school, making new friends, etc. but i shouldn't, as you seem to do amazingly well each and every time. you seem to always find a very special friend wherever we go.  and after we move, even at a young age, you worked hard to keep that friendship going despite the many miles between the two of you. you haven't been with nat since 2006 and your friendship is still a strong and cherished one.

i truly cannot believe you are thirteen and i thank you for thirteen incredible years. you have taught me more than anyone and your goodness is inspirational to all. you have a special something and i truly believe you're going to make your mark in this world (and it will be one great mark, for sure). you see the world so wonderful; i often joke that you see the world as nothing but rainbows and roses (and maybe some horses). when i describe you to others, i usually start with, she's rather angelic. and i really mean that!!

you are obsessed with horses and want to be a large animal veterinarian when you grow up. you even have $800 already saved up to buy your first horse after college. you dream to one day live on a ranch and own lots of horses. hmmm...maybe you'll even be the next big horse whisperer. that wouldn't surprise me one bit!

i wish you the happiest 13th birthday and hope that all your wishes come true -- this and every year. i love you sweet kiele. more than you'll probably ever realize!

thank you for being you...and for being so absolutely amazing! photo above, of kiele and i, taken by untamed heart photography

and while this post is already really long (deservingly so), i close with a poem that kiele wrote the other day:

my own secret forest is filled with dreams.  everyday, after school, it calls my name.  the wind whispers kind words and the flowers wave hello.  the clear bubbling brook, with silver fish, is inviting.  the birds chirp cheery songs, with glee.  i follow the stepping stones down to the brook.  then i jump onto the fallen tree...and walk across.  the long green grass, with colorful wild flowers, tickle my feet.  along the brook's sand bank, i skip some stones.  then is see some deer and follow them, deeper inside the forest.  trees with blooming flowers float in the breeze.  i pull some weeds out and feed them to the deer.  i hear the squirrels chatter and watch the butterflies flutter.  the sunset comes beaming through the forest, with it's beautiful colors.  lightning bugs begin to show themselves with their bright lights.  i catch a few and dance around.  the moon arrives and glances at the brook.  i know it's time.  i let the lightning bugs fly away and say my good-byes.  my time has come to leave.  but my smile remains, for i know i will be back soon -- very soon, to play in my secret forest once again.

fingers and toes

yesterday, the little ones and i got our toes done (aka a pedicure). kiele had a choice...and horseback riding won over pretty toes. ryder basically got a fab foot massage. sky ended up getting her toes and fingers done. it's always a big deal for sky, but when she ends up with pretty flowers on pretty toes and fingers, it's a really big deal. but...last night also happened to be bath night. how am i going to take a bath? i'm going to have to keep my feet and hands out.

you see, she does her best to not get those pretty toes and fingers in the water, for fear that the water may cause damage to her polish. it usually results in a mandatory very quick washing of the affected areas.

note: bath time was three hours post-manicure | pedicure.  this will actually continue for the next week or so.

so last night, i peaked in the bathroom and saw this...

+++

and today, we're headed to st louis, to visit this awesome family. can't wait!!

life goals

sky brought this home from school on friday. and my heart melted.  seriously melted.

and i began thinking about what i would write if i was asked to share three life goals. it's not easy to write just three.  hmmm...

1. try to do and be my best in all i do. 2. remember to give. 3. cherish each and every day.

if you could list only three life goals, what would they be??

p.s. this is my 777th post and yesterday, while watching blind side, 777 kept coming up on the closed captioning throughout the movie.  is someone trying to tell me something?

be grateful

let us be grateful to people who make us happy;they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. - marcel proust

a couple days ago, i asked sky if she would do some pictures with me,

just for a little bit...please.

sure, she said. just for a little bit.

we went out, behind our house, for about 15 minutes -- that's all we had until sunset.  but i was grateful for any amount of time, especially since i hadn't shot in a while.

when i photograph sky, she always (almost always) goes with the flow of my ideas.  i don't really have to give her much direction.  she just does.  i just shoot.  we get each other that way.

and when done, i never forget to thank sky and tell her how great she did.  i don't ever want to take that special time she gives me for granted.

when tucking her that night, i asked her if she knew what a great model she is.

i know, she said, with her sweet, sly sky grin.

good, i replied, with a smile on my face.  you should!

and i was so very grateful... for everything.

go do

came across these lyrics today.love...

go sing too loud make your voice break - sing it out go scream do shout make an earthquake...

you wish fire would die and turn colder you wish your love could see you grow older we should always know that we can do anything

go drum do go out make your hands ache - play it out go march through crowds make your day break...

you wish silence released noise in tremors you wish i know it surrender to summer we should always know that we can do everything

go do you´ll know how to just let yourself fall into landslide

go do you´ll know how to just let yourself give into low tide

go do!

tie strings to clouds make your own lake - let it flow throw seeds to sprout make your own break - let them grow

let them grow let them grow

you will survive we´ll never stop wonders you and sunrise will never fall under

you will survive we´ll never stop wonders you and sunrise will never fall under we should always know that we can do anything

go do!

- lyrics from jonsi's go do

yesterday, i did.

happy easter!

hope it's a super great one -- spent with family and friends or however you want it!! these photos of ryder are some of my most favorite...ever. taken in 2007, in san jan capistrano, at a petting zoo, right after the big san diego fires.

updates

portfolio updates, that is. i try really hard to keep my portfolio up-to-date. of course, there's some images that will probably never come off my online portfolio but that's because i believe in them so strongly. i feel that a current portfolio is so important, as i want my clients to know exactly what they're getting when they hire me. additionally, hopefully our work continues to evolve and grow over time and therefore, our portfolio and website should too...right?!

i'm pretty comfortable with the amount of images in my online portfolio and therefore, when i have a new photograph that i feel should go in my portfolio, an existing image must come down. well this time, it was really hard; i struggled with which ones to replace.

i hope that when people visit my portfolio, they see that i put my heart and soul into selecting images that clearly represent who i am as a photographer and what i love to shoot.

here's a few of the newly added portfolio images. you can see more here.

i so love what i do!!!

wallflower friends

i wanted to share a bit more about our amazing wallflower friends retreat -- a weekend full of sharing, learning, laughing and growing.  and the blossoming of 15 fabulous new friendships. the weekend really was incredible -- a dream come true for leah and i.  we arrived on thursday, nervous and scared. organizing. prepping. practicing.  friday evening brought our welcome reception and dinner.  by the end of the night, leah and i were in awe of the fabulous group that had come our way.  we couldn't have imagined a more magical mix of inspirational women.  and then saturday and sunday...well, we just spilled our hearts and souls and shared everything we could. sunday afternoon, we were exhausted and sad. sad that the workshop had come and gone so quickly. we longed for more!  and now...we dream about the next wallflower friends retreat, hopefully this fall, in a location still to be determined.

i also wanted to share that leah and i are super excited about the launch of our new wallflower friends blog -- a place for continued sharing, growing and inspiration.

last but not least, a few photos of the families, who so graciously volunteered to model for us at the retreat.  thank you sweet families...for everything!

celebrating their lives

today i wanted to share and celebrate the lives of two people, who touched my life in the most beautiful and powerful way over the past few years.  two people, who were taken from this world way too soon. sweet, sweet sam hutchison.  i met sam about three years ago through kiele's deaf itinerant, and began photographing him, when i shot he and max for  the magic water project.  from that point on, i tried to photograph sam and his family as much as i possibly could.

sam was such an incredible child, who loved fancy tennies, soccer, skateboarding and school.  he so cherished his friends and family.  he was gentle and kind and never complained.

after a five year battle with neuroblastoma, sam passed  away on friday, march 12th. while it was incredibly sad to attend sam's service, i was so grateful to be able to hug his parents and offer my condolences in person.  as his parents said at sam's service, his pain and suffering is now done and surely, he is one of the fastest angels up in Heaven right now.

and kirsten sandtrom, who was the cousin of a dear friend of mine, passed away yesterday.  after suffering from a chronic cough for a while, kirsten was diagnosed with adrenal cancer with metastasis to her liver and lungs, last july.  i was able to photograph kirsten and her family on a few different occasions.  kirsten (37) was an amazingly strong woman, who had a faith and spirit like no other.  she was truly beautiful inside and out and fought for her life with everything she had.  her family is absolutely amazing and i feel so blessed to have gotten to know kirsten and her family.

kirsten passed away yesterday morning, in her sleep.  i read on her site that she knew it was time -- she asked for forgiveness for anything she had done and then held on to say her goodbyes and share her love with her family, who was driving in...before closing her eyes for the last time.  my heart aches so much for her husband and three boys.

please, please keep both the hutchison and sandstrom families in your thoughts and prayers.  i just can't imagine!

and please don't forget to cherish and celebrate each and every day!!  thank you sam and kirsten for coming into my life and teaching me what it's like to truly live and appreciate.

something special

when i first started my blog and was figuring out how things were going to flow, i knew that i couldn't commit to blogging about each and every client and therefore, decided my blog was going to be about things that touched my soul and hopefully, in doing so, i would inspire someone, somewhere, someday.  well today, i feel it necessary to blog about one of my clients, as she has completely touched my soul.  meet 10-year-old miss E.

photographing E and her family was my last and tenth session in san diego (in 3 1/2 days). E's mom was the winner of my donated photography package, for max's ring of fire auction.

i began the session photographing the kids -- E and her 12-year-old brother.  E is a pretty girl and super sweet, but also quite shy and reserved.  when we first met, i wondered how i was going to get her to relax with me.  but it didn't take long for E to be completely comfortable with me and my camera.  within about five minutes, it was as if it  was just she and i -- no one else in the world mattered.  during that time, E was the prettiest girl in the world and maybe even the most magical princess in the world.  i just kept saying,

keep doing your thing; you are so beautiful...

...and kept clicking.  i was in awe at her beauty and her willingness to openly and honestly share that beauty with me.

E has something special -- a magical beauty that shines from within.  i can't stop thinking of E and the gift she left with me that day.  she touched my soul and her beauty filled my heart.

when i got home (to KS), i shared with E's mom a bit about what i hoped to blog about E, while also asking her permission to do so.  she said she would love that and also shared a bit of E's writings, from her home journal:

love. blossom. live in happiest, forever together. in peace and in bad, i will love you. in all my love for you. when you are mad, remember a new day is ahead of you.  do not live in the past, live in the present. forgive and forget. live strong and in wisdom. remember to care about others  and  yourself. treat others the way you want to be treated. try to be nice to people as many times as possible and give in. remember forgive.

as i read E's words, tears filled my eyes and my thoughts of E's exceptional inner beauty were more than confirmed.  E is one special child and i can't wait to see what she shares with and teaches this world.  she has definitely touched me and taught me how truly powerful and magical inner beauty is.

where do i start?

if i thought my mind was a swirly mess before, well...now it's a really crazy, swirly, mess. but it's a different kind of mess.  a grateful one--trying hard to focus on getting organized and getting something accomplished.  i can barely figure out where to start?  actually, i think everything on the to-do list has been started and nothing on the to-do list has been checked off.  i pretty much just keep bouncing around, from task to task...here, there and everywhere. even sitting here at my keyboard, thinking i finally might have a blog post figured out, i struggle.  too many thoughts in my head.  too much i want to share.

hmmmm... i guess i'll start with the fact that the wallflower friends retreat was absolutely amazing. seriously. absolutely. amazing!! leah and i feel so very blessed... and thankful!

meet the spring wallflower friends.

hopefully in the next few days, we'll be launching the wallflower friends blog, where we'll share much more about the retreat.

for the moment, let me say that the experience touched my soul and without a doubt, has impacted me for a lifetime.

after the retreat in twentynine palms, i drove to san diego, to shoot 10 client sessions. it's hard for me to explain my feelings through it all. it was definitely more emotional than usual.

having not shot much in kansas city, i had almost forgotten how much shooting means to me; how much photography is a part of my soul.  there was actually a time this winter, where i felt that i was losing myself--a misunderstanding of sorts.

and then the shooting in san diego began, and i couldn't have been happier.  it was as if a part of me was alive again.  i felt like i could have shot 30 more sessions--right then and there. my heart was happy and session by session, my heart was becoming more and more full.  and i was becoming more and more alive again.

i had missed shooting even more than i had realized.

in closing, i share a few wallflower friends and san diego images (details coming soon, in future posts :-) ).

p.s. thank you for being patient with my lack of blogging. i'll simply blame it on stress.

a swirly, swirly mess

yes, my mind is a swirly mess right now--trying to focus on just one thing, yet instead focusing on everything all at once.  madly racing around from thought to thought. i have the personality that thrives on busy.  but sometimes the busy overwhelms even me.  and the anxiousness sets in, holds on tight and won't let go.  that's about where i am right now. thinking about...

nursing continuing education credits. must finish 60 CEUs before march 1st.  of course, i dread doing them, so i wait until the last minute.  and then get mad because life would have been much easier if i worked on them regularly over the two years (yes, years!!).  and then i wait longer, until it's truly the last minute.  aye!

our future tampa house. which we did not find yet.  and we continue to ponder the pros and cons of the different areas.  and different houses. something like this... more house for the money. less house but possibly better investment, but needs tons of work. near old friends. near new friends. schools are bad. schools are good. schools are great. high school is good. middle school is terrible. elementary school is great. five minutes from beach. 30 minutes from beach. pool. no pool. quiet and safe. cool and close to everything. garage. no garage. lots of storage. no storage. 45 minute commute to work. 15 minutes to work. travel for horseback riding lessons and gymnastics. minimal travel. needs tons of renovations. needs minimal renovations. will it rent? will it be a good investment? can a high school be too big? what about the rumor of money and drugs? gamble with a short sale? what's really important? and that's just the beginning of the pros vs. cons game.

our workshop. i'm so excited, i can barely stand it. but nervous too. can't help it.  it's now less than a month away.  we've given it our heart and soul, but is that enough?  and there's the last minute details that look crazy on paper, but i know it's really not. so every time i glance at the paper, i remind myself that all is okay and all will get done.

and since i'm griping...this weather. i'm so done with the cold (60-year record breaking cold). i want to shoot. outdoors. and can't. well, i can but it's too fricken cold!! i know shooting wouldn't really help my situation right now, being so busy and all. but it actually does. it calms me. even to just shoot and edit one photo. i long for it.

and then i remind myself about this amazing session in portland, shot a few weekends ago, which i'll properly blog about soon. need my mind in the right place, to do justice to this magical momma and daughter team.  a magical team who completely embraces confidence and loving and being yourself.  i'll leave it at that and share these photos.

and how excited am i to get skater socks for my entire family. thanks terri. love you. hang in there friend. and come visit me. pretty please.

happy birthday

happy 149th kansas!  yep, today is kansas day.  i'm not sure what's happening for kansas day in our small town of of 10,000.  crazy to think that san diego has a population of 1.28 million and tampa, 341,000  seriously? san diego...almost 1.3 million? okay, back to kansas...

it's been fun living in a small city.  it's been a great change and experience for my kids.  change of seasons.  snow.  farms, horses, cows.  new friends.

don't get me wrong...i have missed a couple things, especially lately.  like warm weather and a variety of nearby restaurants.  i dream about spring and warm weather.  it doesn't even have to be that warm.  a consistent 50 degrees would be awesome.  the cold and snow were fun at first, but i'm officially over it now.  over it, with months still to go.  and restaurants.  we have a few but in all honesty, we really only enjoy one--tampico (mexican restaurant).  i know, i know...perfect opportunity to work on my cooking skills.  yea.  ummm.  i'm working on that.

in celebration of kansas day, i'm going to search for sunflowers (state flower) to brighten my kitchen.  i'm sure whole foods has them.  too bad whole foods is a 45 minute drive.

here's some of my favorite photos taken here in kansas.

oh...

i do have one request from our city of lansing.  please invest in garbage cans and those automatic trash trucks.  breaks my heart to see guys walking from house to house, picking up trash bags one by one and throwing them into the back of the truck.  seriously...i thought all cities would have had the automatic thing going on by now.  maybe two requests.  i really wish you had free recycling so that more people would recycle.  i mean it's not really that expensive, but expensive enough that i don't see that many people doing it.

it's all official

i'm off to portland the weekend of february 5th - 7th, to work on finalizing workshop stuff and see this magical woman. then we're off to tampa february 12th-15th, to house hunt.  let the anxiety begin.

then i'm off to twentynine palms march 11th-14th, for our wallflower friends workshop retreat.  so excited!

and then...to san diego, for client shoots, march 15th-18th. i still have a couple AM openings. if interested, please email me at deb@debsphotographs.com.

OH. MY. GOSH.

no offense to kansas, but i can't wait to see and shoot here again.

for the love of...

film. i've been talking about it for years now--shooting film; however, that's all i've been doing. talking about it. for some reason, i feel like i need someone to hold my hand. not sure why. what am i scared of? what is holding me back? nothing more than myself. and that frustrates me.

i have two film cameras (a canon and a bronica) sitting on the shelf right above my computer...collecting dust. i seriously look at them all day. every day. cheryl jacobs tried to help me get my bronica to work, when we visited her in colorado, but something seemed to be wrong with the back. so yesterday, i ordered a new back and i'm determined to use it. as for the canon, it's fine. i've just had a bunch of lame excuses and haven't had the courage to pick it up.

damn it! this is the year--i am picking up those cameras and shooting film. i am! no more excuses. no one needs to hold my hand.

speaking of film and polaroid, here's some of my favorite polaroids from over the years.

snow day

the conversation yesterday morning went kind of like this... her: i think one of the things we should discuss at the workshop is the importance of shooting often; you just need to get out there and shoot. every day, if you can. i don't do this but i should. i want to. me: yea. but you have to remember that some of us live in the snow and it's freezing right now. her: well you can still shoot. me, making excuses: like i really want to shoot, when we've been cooped up in the house for days. and like the kids really want me to shoot, when they're constantly bickering with each other. and me. her: i think it's part of improving, growing and getting out of a funk. you just have to shoot. me: well it's not going to be happening anytime soon here. her, i'm guessing: *rolling eyes*

after i picked up ryder from preschool, the snow started falling.  i was grateful for our first big snow storm and it's accompanying beauty.  well, it wasn't really the first storm, but it was the first to happen during the day.  and we were loving it. so on the drive home, ryder and i stopped in an open field and i took my iphone grateful | 365 shot for the day.

later, as i watched the snow fall from the comfort of my warm living room, leah's words rang in my ears. i thought...

it really is so beautiful. maybe i can convince one of the kids to come out front with me for just a couple minutes. for just a few shots. nothing big.  just something in the snow. we're in kansas...for only one year. and we might not get another good snow like this again. it's been so long...i need to shoot.

i asked sky first because she is typically the most willing of the three.  and she agreed. we went out in front of the house, for just a couple minutes.  till sky wiped out. her hands covered in snow and freezing, that was it and we went inside. i immediately plugged in the card and was so excited to edit a few of them. it's like a part of me was alive again. having not shot in what seemed like forever (except with my iphone), it felt so good. you see...when i don't shoot for a long time, this door opens (the wrong door) and self-doubt always seems to sneak in.

what happens if i've lost it? what happens if i go out and shoot and they all suck? i'm in a funk.

after getting a taste of it, i wanted more and begged sky to go with me, on the walking path behind our house...for just a few more minutes. just a few more shots. and she agreed again. :-)

excitedly (me more than her), we walked down the completely snow covered walking path. the snow was still falling and it was so, so beautiful, quiet and pure. just she and i. magical! sky played along with my excitement and let me shoot away. gloveless, i continued my hands couldn't take it anymore.

i share this because i really do believe you have to shoot often. every day if you can. it's funny how we can convince ourselves at times that we're in a funk. that we just can't shoot. that we suck. whatever. it's during those times, those times where self-doubt somehow snuck in, that it's most important to just pick up our cameras and shoot. something. somewhere.

thank you leah. for being that little voice that reminds me and pushes me. and doesn't accept or believe all my excuses.

here's some of my favorites.

every day

not sure if i ever shared this video.  with tears streaming down my face, i viewed it again today, after visiting the mikulak's blog, which i check regularly.  i think about max and his family each and every day, as they have touched my life in a way that is beyond words!  thank you max and the entire mikulak family for making my life fuller, making me a better person and teaching me how very important it is to live and cherish each and every day to the fullest!!

in sharing this, i encourage you and challenge  you to give  in any way you can this year and every year.  it will touch you in ways that are truly indescribable. if you'd like to help in pediatric cancer fundraising and advocacy, max's ring of fire charity foundation can be found here.

this video is 18 minutes long and amazing. max was such an incredible little boy, whose life was so sadly stolen by neuroblastoma at the age of seven.

(too short) Life | Max Mikulak | Max's Ring of Fire www.MaxsRingOfFire.org from Andy Mikulak on Vimeo.

if you don't have 18 minutes right now, there's also this video. about four minutes long.

Inspiration | Max Mikulak | Max's Ring of Fire www.MaxsRingOfFire.org from Andy Mikulak on Vimeo.

eta: looking for other ways to give with your photography skills? check out the give ten project for ideas (there's links of how to give on the right side).