i never thought i'd say this...

i miss kansas. i miss... the seasons. the weedy fields. the trees. the corn fields. the hay bails. the changing leaves. the broken down barns. the cows. the cold. the snow. the slow. the peace. the quiet. yep, i'm missing kansas.

i want to get back to that place -- maybe not physically but mentally, as a photographer. i want to get back to exploring and shooting for me.  what's stopping me?  

not. a. damn. thing.

but me.

kansas was definitely a place and time in my life that i will never forget...for so very many reasons.  i am so, so grateful for the time.  kansas was simply meant to be...even if for only a year.

follow your heart

your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. and most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. they somehow already know what you truly want to become.- steve jobs

it's so easy to get caught up in being inspired by others', which often results in feeling frustrated and discouraged with our own work. and that's exactly when we need to dig a little deeper, trust ourselves and follow the direction our heart is telling us to go.

for the love of...

film. i've been talking about it for years now--shooting film; however, that's all i've been doing. talking about it. for some reason, i feel like i need someone to hold my hand. not sure why. what am i scared of? what is holding me back? nothing more than myself. and that frustrates me.

i have two film cameras (a canon and a bronica) sitting on the shelf right above my computer...collecting dust. i seriously look at them all day. every day. cheryl jacobs tried to help me get my bronica to work, when we visited her in colorado, but something seemed to be wrong with the back. so yesterday, i ordered a new back and i'm determined to use it. as for the canon, it's fine. i've just had a bunch of lame excuses and haven't had the courage to pick it up.

damn it! this is the year--i am picking up those cameras and shooting film. i am! no more excuses. no one needs to hold my hand.

speaking of film and polaroid, here's some of my favorite polaroids from over the years.